About That Noel Gallagher Oasis Split

Good riddance to bad news, we say. Oasis, please stay broken up. From your friends at BLURT.

By Fred Mills

While the music biz buzz over the weekend was clearly centered around Noel Gallagher's surprise announcement at the Oasisnet.com site that he was quitting the band he'd founded, perhaps it's less instructive to parse Gallagher's words than those of the folks who determined their level of punditry qualified them to do the parsing.

First, that Gallagher statement, posted late Friday:

"It's with some sadness and great relief to tell you that I quit Oasis tonight. People will write and say what they like, but I simply could not go on working with Liam a day longer. Apologies to all the people who bought tickets for the shows in Paris, Konstanz and Milan."

All currently scheduled Oasis concerts were cancelled in the wake of the statement. Apparently the band had been preparing to perform Friday at a French music festival, but the two brothers had a huge argument - one observer, singer Amy McDonald, would subsequently Twitter, "Oasis cancelled again with one minute to stage time! Liam smashed Noel's guitar, huuuge fight!" - leading the festival organizers to announce that the show was off: "The group no longer exists. They will not play tonight and they are cancelling the rest of their European tour... The group no longer exists. They will not play tonight and they are cancelling the rest of their European tour."

On Saturday Britain's Daily Mail looked into the situation, pointing out that relations between the brothers had deteriorated in recent months to the point that they "traveled separately on tour and only saw each other onstage." (Periodically the two have taken potshots at one another during separate interviews.) The paper also posted photos of Liam plus the other Oasis members leaving their Paris hotel.

Let's not forget, however, that this isn't the first time Gallagher has split from his brother and his band - acting, depending on your point of view, like a diva or just drunk and pissy - as he briefly quit in 2000 at a show in Paris. Liam Gallagher, for his part, famously "quit" in 1995 on the eve of a U.S. tour, although that was short-lived as well. As the Gallagher's mom Peggy told reporters this weekend, "They're just tired at the end of the tour. They've had fights before and got over it. The funny thing is, they didn't fight as children. They didn't fight until they started the band." And erstwhile Creation Recs boss Alan McGee chimed in as well, telling the BBC, "It's obviously the worst fall-out that they've ever had, and they've had some pretty bad ones. But they love each other. They'll come back together." So it's probably way too early to predict whether or not this marks a final divorce or just another temporary separation.

Speculation among insiders is that Liam's heavy drinking on the tour may have been the trigger in all this; the singer reportedly had been acting out and insulting everyone around him, including his brother's family. After leaving Paris, Liam left for Italy with his wife Nicole. By Saturday, Noel had taken to the band's website again to clarify his position:

"I feel you have the right to know that the level of verbal and violent intimidation towards me, my family, friends and comrades has become intolerable," the guitarist said. "And the lack of support and understanding from my management and band mates has left me with no other option than to get me cape and seek pastures new."

Still, when a professional turd like Perez Hilton weighs in on the personal foibles of a rock band, it's entirely possible that said rock band has, in the parlance, jumped the fucking shark anyway. Leave it to Hilton to dredge up the most unseemly quote in the whole Liam-versus-Noel tit-for-tat. Hilton wrote on his site:

"A recent remark Liam made regarding Noel's daughter, Anais, was reportedly the final nail in the coffin for Noel! Liam allegedly ‘jokingly suggested' that Noel was not the real father of his 9-year-old daughter!!!

"‘It was a dumb thing to say,' an insider close to the brothers says. ‘They had a big fight when he made the gag. Noel went for him. He was in a blind fury. And he still hasn't calmed down.' Noel considered his brother's comment ‘unforgivable,' which led to his abrupt exit from the band."

Ah well... who cares. The band was long past its expiration date. Can anybody even name a song or album title of the band from the past half-decade or so?

Good riddance, Oasis. Please, don't get back together. Save us the drama.